Do you date or just hook up?

| 1 October , 2008 | Reply

I’m usually not a big fan of reading dating books but I’m quite hooked on this one.  Why?  Because it’s just so sensible.

This latest book about the dating world is by the bestselling author, Greg Behrendt who wrote He’s Just Not that Into You.  He’s teamed up with his wife, Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt and it really is a goodie.

It's Just A Date_lr

I wouldn’t say it was a ‘rule’ book per se because it takes you back to basics and reminds you that dating is about you, not the other person.  You see I was having this same conversation with a friend a couple of months ago, how the dating scene has become really confusing and so super casual.

And my favourite insight from Amiira is ‘women always have and always will continue to date a man’s potential instead of his reality’ … I cannot tell you how many times I have done this in the past.  We just cannot help ourselves can we?  It’s our nature to be hopeful and I swear I am the most hopeful girl on the planet!!

And I just love Greg’s tip that guys apparently follow OUR lead … so that means if we give them the easy way out, by just agreeing to hang out or hook up, they’ll take it!  What we forget to determine is the value of our time and the value of our company and how we date!  He says that if you think about it … it’s only when you set the value of your time low and you agree to non-dates that they can exist for you, however, if you maintain a high standard for how you date and you don’t accept the premise of quasi-dating, non-dating and hanging out, then you leave him with only two choices:  to ask you out on a proper date or to do without your company.  And if he chooses the latter, then you’re better off anyway because getting to spend time with you is a gigantic prize!

How fabulous is this?  It’s just so true and sensible, it’s about empowering ourselves so this is why I think it’s just a fantabolous book to read.

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